Happy birthday to me!

Okay I know this is 6 days late, but hurrah! I am now twenty-three. I feel like I'm actually in my twenties now.  Maybe because I've had a lot of experiences and such the last couple of years?

I always have terrible birthdays, start from when I was 16. My mom and I got in a fight and she told me that if I wanted a birthday cake, then I should make it myself. Wow. And thus the downward spiral, not ever looking forward to my birthday, began.  It seems like the most insignificant things just become so large and ruin my birthday every year.  This year...was different.  My husband was wonderful as usual (aside from one of the presents he was thrilled to buy me and I didn't like...I'M SORRY honey...I love you!) and I got lots of birthday wishes.  What really pulled this birthday over the top in terms of how wonderful it was...was that I have more friends. I've made some wonderful friends with some girls at the church I'm going to, and I got to spend the day celebrating with them.  Getting a pedicure, going out to eat, getting some plants to plant. I had a great time.

And so all of this week, I've been sending up lots and lots of  "Thank you, Lord!" type of conversations and prayers and praises. I truly am so blessed to be where I am right now, with a job that I love (performing, not going to), and a husband that loves me unconditionally with all my craziness.  What more could a girl ask for?

Exhausted

Well my trip with my mom to Branson, MO was great. The travel day home was not. Needless to say, after being stuck in airplanes and airports for 15+ hours on Sunday, I am still tired and recovering.

My day yesterday was just terrible at work. Things just keep getting worse and worse and I finally just broke down and sobbed the entire way home. A couple of months ago I relinquished control of the situation to God and things seemed to improve a bit after that. But now it's back to where it was before -- my manager is being incredibly...just mean spirited, I guess, and I am so tired of dealing with the negativity all the time. I mean, it's 24/7! I am never given a pat on the back or praise for all the hard work I do and I'm so tired of being treated poorly.

So yesterday I sobbed and sobbed and asked God for his mercy and help. I don't necessarily feel at peace and I still feel depressed, so I don't know what He is going to do. We'll see, I suppose.

The Dress of Fail...

So after my total splurge last weekend I was totally pumped up and ready to make my dress. First dress comes from McCall's pattern 5094 (see picture below). I wanted to go with #D (pictured in purple) but I bought some super cute yellow fabric with outlines of dragonflies on it.

So after I get home I realized that I bought the wrong sizes for the other two patterns. And possibly this pattern. This one had up to size 10, and I've been losing weight lately, and dropped a dress size as of late. So I thought that size ten would work great for me.

I can't even tell you all the problems I had with this. Not only did some of the pattern pieces not line up correctly when sewing them together in the middle (bodice and midriff), I had to do a little creative thinking in cutting out new, larger pieces.  That was big problem number one. Problem number two was total user error -- I didn't realize I needed fabric for a lining. Back to the store I went, not a big deal.  Problem number three was the zipper -- after sewing it together in the back, it didn't line up correctly. Meaning the seams for the bodice/midriff on each side didn't line up together well. I attribute this to some error in the actual pattern that was printed. So I ripped the seam out and did it again. This time it bunched up at the bottom. Ripped out the seam again and sewed it up in total frustration thinking, "this better work!!"  Well the seams lined up the best they could, but the fabric at the top of the zipper did not match up, one was higher than the other.  At this point I was basically ripping my hair out and saying "Forget it! It's good enough! Nobody's going to notice anyway!!"

So, excited that this dress from hell is finally done...what do I do? Excitedly rip my clothes off and try it on. And it's too small.

Now, I'm not a big girl. I'm average size, and I am coming to love my body more and more. So I am totally not thinking I'm fat -- I'm thinking I'm going to burn the dress.  But the more logical side of me is thinking I better just lose a couple of pounds until it fits. Then I'll rock it out with my cute white kitten heels.  Here's the finished product:

Nerd alert!!

So I went to Joann today after working out (never the best time to go shopping considering I'm weak in mind and body, haha) and they had the "Daffodil Dash" sale going on. Pretty much everything you could ever dream of wanting is on sale.

What I originally went in for was a Sizzix machine - as an early birthday present to myself, mind you, and they were all out of the one I wanted. Bummer!  So I meandered around and found some fabric to make more Nook covers. I still haven't mastered the iPad cover so I think I'm going to put that on the backburner for a while since I have a million ideas for covers for the Nook Simple Touch that I have mastered.  Anyway, I found out that McCalls patterns were on sale for...wait for it...99¢!!! How can I pass that up?!!? Answer: I can't. So I picked out three patterns then I mozied on over to the fabric again and picked out some fabulous fabrics to make the pattens out of. I'm SO excited.

Here's a picture of my splurge:

Yeah I'm pretty excited. I totally want to wear a lot of dresses and skirts this summer.  How about the rest of you girls??

Faith Story

Tonight at my church house group (like a bible study) I shared my faith story.  I was really nervous all this week working up about what to talk about, and not ramble on about.  All in all I think it went pretty well. A lot of the women came up and hugged me afterward, which made me feel like it was all worth it.

One thing that I'm coming to realize is it's not much OF a faith story.  I mean...I am in my early twenties, and I felt like I had a good relationship with God, but I think after confessing and sharing my story with all of my new friends and house group members, I realize that I really don't have as good of a relationship with God as I pretended to.  I realize now that I have a lot of growing up to do in my walk with God and I have a lot of things that I still need to learn and deal with and commit to.  I want to be so much closer to the Lord and I know how to now.

I've got some friends that I've made already at house group and I am so excited to get to know them more, and I can't thank God enough for them.  I need to start following Him more, and relinquish that control I love so much in my life.

Penny for your thoughts?

Five years from now...

Today my church started a new series called, "Future You".  Basically it's like this: If you could come back to TODAY from the future, what would you say to yourself? What would you tell yourself? What advice would you give?  Today's sermon was FIVE years from now.  Next week will be FIFTY years from now, and the week after will be five hundred years from now.

Pastor Dave really hit home today with starting off saying, "If you could go back to 2007, what would you tell yourself?"  Then he proceeded to say that give years from now, we probably would give ourselves the same advice.  Examples -- "Quit the addiction, NOW." or "You really need to take your relationship with God more seriously, take it to the next level" or "You don't really need to spend that much time on facebook" (guilty...), or "Spend more time with the people you love, and be kind to them." Things like that. 

So I started thinking. What would I say to 2007 Amber?  There were a few answers that I'd rather not share that came to mind immediately. And a few things that I had to really think about.  But I had a few realizations.  I'm wasting time on activities or things that really just don't matter. What are my priorities at home, at work, in my relationships, and why?  What kind of life changes can I make NOW to have a better future?

Sounds like I need to start changing. First thing -- spend more time with my husband. No more sittnig in different rooms doing our own thing. We need some good quality husband and wife time together. Even if it means watching a movie I don't want to watch. Or going to eat somewhere I don't want to go. Or showing more kindness. Not arguing about stupid things. Kissing him a couple more times every day.

What would the future you, five years from now, tell you TODAY?

Fasting too much??

So apparently I decided to fast blogging waaaay longer than I should have! OOPS!  Fasting electronics for a week was TOUGH.  I was constantly thinking to myself, "Man I would love to blog about this! Or that! Or this!" And what happens when I'm actually able to use them again? I totally ignore my blog. :( Sad day. 

Things have been going OK around here. My job is at a lull right now -- super boring most of the time, and I'm trying to find another position at least part time, hopefully full time. I had a job interview scheduled for this morning, but the lady called and had to reschedule because she had a meeting that came up.

We went on vacation to California! My best friend in the ENTIRE world, Reanna, got married!! Oh my, she was so beautiful.  I was sobbing the entire day. She's like a sister to me- I've known her practically my entire life.  Here's a picture of the beautiful bride on her wedding day:

Her husband, Josh, is one of the coolest guys in the world. He treats her so well, and gives her the love and respect that she deserved. I'm so excited that they're starting their life together!  I love you, Re!!

In other news, Brian and I finally finished our taxes (oh, one day before they're due... O_o ).  We were told originally by our tax guy that we owe the IRS like five grand. OMG. We were freaking out.  Correction -- I was freaking out.  Then we decided to not be stupid and to actually figure out our deductions and the cost for running his ebay business. Thank the Lord we did - because that number went down to four hundred dollars. That's manageable. That doesn't make me want to rip my hair out lol.

ALSO -- We're going to JAPAN in October for two weeks! HOLEY MOLEY I'm excited.  I keep telling myself, "You gotta study your Japanese" but we'll see if that will actually work. *Sigh* I've got a lot of stuff on my plate right now, haha.

Well, that's it for now. Mostly because I've got nothing else of importance to post. I'll post again soon, I promise!