Thursday, May 17, 2012

Happy birthday to me!

Okay I know this is 6 days late, but hurrah! I am now twenty-three. I feel like I'm actually in my twenties now.  Maybe because I've had a lot of experiences and such the last couple of years?

I always have terrible birthdays, start from when I was 16. My mom and I got in a fight and she told me that if I wanted a birthday cake, then I should make it myself. Wow. And thus the downward spiral, not ever looking forward to my birthday, began.  It seems like the most insignificant things just become so large and ruin my birthday every year.  This year...was different.  My husband was wonderful as usual (aside from one of the presents he was thrilled to buy me and I didn't like...I'M SORRY honey...I love you!) and I got lots of birthday wishes.  What really pulled this birthday over the top in terms of how wonderful it was...was that I have more friends. I've made some wonderful friends with some girls at the church I'm going to, and I got to spend the day celebrating with them.  Getting a pedicure, going out to eat, getting some plants to plant. I had a great time.

And so all of this week, I've been sending up lots and lots of  "Thank you, Lord!" type of conversations and prayers and praises. I truly am so blessed to be where I am right now, with a job that I love (performing, not going to), and a husband that loves me unconditionally with all my craziness.  What more could a girl ask for?

Tuesday, May 8, 2012


Well my trip with my mom to Branson, MO was great. The travel day home was not. Needless to say, after being stuck in airplanes and airports for 15+ hours on Sunday, I am still tired and recovering.

My day yesterday was just terrible at work. Things just keep getting worse and worse and I finally just broke down and sobbed the entire way home. A couple of months ago I relinquished control of the situation to God and things seemed to improve a bit after that. But now it's back to where it was before -- my manager is being incredibly...just mean spirited, I guess, and I am so tired of dealing with the negativity all the time. I mean, it's 24/7! I am never given a pat on the back or praise for all the hard work I do and I'm so tired of being treated poorly.

So yesterday I sobbed and sobbed and asked God for his mercy and help. I don't necessarily feel at peace and I still feel depressed, so I don't know what He is going to do. We'll see, I suppose.